Recap: Rockies Molest Giants in Coors. A lot.

Oh noes!!

Uh, it’s only one game. It’s only one game. It’s only one game, right? Right?! *tries to remain calm*…it’s just a game…one single ga…AKAJEREE FUCKK!K!!!!! *alarms sound* ABORT! ABORT! PUPPIES ARE DYING!!!

After what looked to be a promising game when the Giants miraculously jumped out to another 5 run lead for the second night in a row, this one turned wrong – quickly. With the Giants up 6-1 in the bottom of the 6th, the Rockies got runners to second and third off a epic mental fuckup from Aaron Rowand. Rowand, who had failed with the stick (that’s what she said) twice earlier in the game put on his hero shoes and tried to gun out *clap clap clap* TULO!!!! going to third with a retarded throw which allowed the trail runner to advance to second. The next batter, Ian Stewart, decided he’d bomb one to left center and the anal pillage was on from that point. The Giants added five cheap runs between the 8th and 9th innings to make the final score respectable, but this was a true stinker. Thankfully, it’s only one game. And thankfully Lord Lincecum takes the mound tomorrow. A win tomorrow and we’re in the drivers seat, with the worst thing happening being a series split. A loss tomorrow, and well, I might as well cut my penis off and feed it to a wild wolverine as I shove ice cubes down my undyroo’s and howl like a menstruating cat in heat. Wait, what?

Final Score:

Giants – 11

Rockies – 14

Puppies Killed – Many